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From the Parish Priest’s Desk

I have already made a number of reflections over how a husband can help preseve his marriage.

In this month of April I shall try to put before you some reflections over how a wife can help preserve her marriage.


A certain married woman described her experience saying that when she was just married she felt that she married a perfect man. So her first year was like a honeymoon. The second year was a little less than that. The third year when children began to come, and the spirit of their marriage began to fall apart, she began to realize what she was doing and took definite steps to change the spirit of their marriage restoring it in a most beautiful way: 1) She tried to respect her husband. 2) She accepted him as spiritual leader. 3) She wisely and loving appeals to her husband. 4) and develops inward and outward beauty.

First, she respects her husband buy praising him for the godly character and abilities she could see in his life. She would not focus on his faults but rather on his positive qualities.

A man needs his wife's admiration, so she would never show a lack of respect for her husband's decision responding to her husband physical affection she would never resists his affection so that he did not allow himself to be drawn to other women who demonstrate more respect and appreciation for him.

Secondly, she would accept her husband as her spiritual leader expressing gratefulness for the efforts he puts to demonstrate his spiritual leadership. Therefore, she will thank her husband for his prayers, she would praise his efforts to lead family devotions and prayer times. she would appreciate the importance he gives to the Scriptures inspiring her and their children.

She would encourage each step her husband takes communicating her confidence that God is working in the family through his decisions.

Finally, she would look and admire her husband's excellent qualities.

Thirdly, she has to wisely and lovingly appeal to her husband. Therefore, when she make an appeal to him she will make it in such a way that she shows a concern to him that he may walk with God for his welfare, his reputation, his goals and his authority. So, she has to wait for the right timing to make the appeal and demonstrate an honoring and respectful attitude when doing so.

A good relationship maintained with the husband and the appeal made with love, loyalty, gratefulness, honor and obedience will certainly produce positive and favourable responses. But a wife has to be also prepared to accept in all humility the negative responses from the husband who later on may ponder and accept her rejected observations because of her appeal made not with an attitude of demand but in a humble, loving sincere and well intention one.

Lastly, by developing inner qualities such a faith, strength, joy, meekness and love; maintaining personal neatness; by wearing clothes and hair in a way that honors her husband's preference; by managing her weight on the basis of five scriptural truths: 1) her body made in the image of God (Gen. 1:27) 2) her body is the temple of God Holy Spirit, (Cor. 3: 16-17); 3) Her body member of the mystical body of Christ (1 Cor 6:15); 4) the member of her body become instruments of righteousness by yielding them to God. 5) Claiming the victory over the lust of the flesh that Christ has already won. (Rom. 6-8).

With the lack of inward Godliness and outward neatness and modesty the husband can lose respect for his wife and be more easily tempted by other women.

Wishing a very Happy Easter with showers of blessings of the Rise Lord, I conclude.


Fr. Francisco De Mello
Parish Priest.